well yesterday Niko had his screening.. As much as I was looking forward to it, I was dreading it. As a parent we always tell ourselves we want the best for our children. We want them to be smart, loving, and successful in whatever they choose to do. and of course happy.. Well when I found out that Meeka was severly behind in her speech of course I beat myself up over it as her mother, racking my brain as to what I could have done differently to help her, why she wasn't talking. why I was the bad parent. So when Niko was born I told myself I'm going to double my efforts, I did, I sang to him, I read to him, I interacted with him, everything that I should be doing. and yet here I am once again with a child that is delayed in speech. I do feel that it is my fault, even though the teachers always say that it's not, but I feel that way.. I feel that there is MORE that I should have been doing.. so Niko will get tested again. the first screening the teacher said that  she would refer him on to the next teacher, because by now he should have at least 10 words down and he has none... as much as I'm glad that he will get the service and the help I feel that o nce again I have failed as a parent. Well this week is going to be a busy one, Meeka has dance on Wed, we have parents night on  Thu, and then something on friday I forget right now but it's on the calendar, so  it's a busy one.

well this is a good start for me actually posting 2x in one month. yay for me!. Well this week was productive, we had Niko's 2 yr appt at the Dr's and of course for his height and weight he's at the top of the chart!! He's a big boy that is for sure. Then we had his party on Sat. My brother didn't make it and of course Nixon's dad didn't make it... There is a surprise... anyway he always has some excuse and Nixon just really doesn't want to talk to him and even invite him... he says he grew up with out him and really he doesn't care if he's here or not.. me of course I get VERY upset by this, and actually got pretty emotional over the whole ordeal... in the end we always just end up not caring about him, but still for me it's hard!  Niko had a good party lots of cake left! it was just my aunt and uncle and then my dad. my grandma didn't make it. She wasn't feeling very well. She is going through Chemo right now. and she has about 4 months left. She is taking March off, but I still understand.  THey are actually leaving tomorrow to go down to MO to see Mary and Steve and go to graceland, which should be really fun  for my grandma. So I'm excited for them. But here all is the same nothing besides that. oh I did call the school system for Niko to get tested for his speech, he's pretty slow just like Meeka and I would much rather start sooner with him than later like we did with Meeka, I want him to be able to communicate and talk with other kids and with us, and by this point 2yrs he should be able to do so. So I hope that he will be able to get help, like Meeka. Tomorrow I'm really excited to go get my haircut and colored!! YAY for me for having some ME time! It is much needed (along with our vacation in 3 weeks) so I'm slowly getting ready for the Dells, finding swim-suits, seeing what still fits. I had to buy Meeka a new suit actually 2 and NIko a rashguard and a new suit too... They just grow and grow! I know they will get plenty of use out of them this summer so I"m pretty excited!! I've had my heart set on getting a water-slide so I told Nixon THIS year we are... I was so close last year but decided not too.. NOT this year!!! so I"m excited the kids will LOVE it!! So that was that, and nothing else is new... still working on No#3 it's our 2nd month, while Nixon is loving the practice... I'm doing better with the emotional part of it, and understanding that everything is in the Lord's hands and timing... and that he is the one that truly understands when it's best for us, but it's still hard I do have my hands full with these two so they do keep me busy. I just signed them both up for a TON of art classes for this summer so that should keep us busy and I'm wondering if I should sign Meeka up for dance this summer too :) I'll look into prices and everything . I want her to take it all year around! It's something she enjoys and loves so it's great to see her have fun. Anyway that's all for now.

well today is Niko's 2nd Birthday. I can't believe my little baby boy is 2 yrs old. he is seriously a creature and hard to handle!! He is wonderful and crazy and into everything, very curious and so much a boy it's crazy! He loves cars, trains, and Timmy time is his favorite cartoon. He loves to copy his sister, especially if she is doing something she's not suppose to, he's a dare devil , risk taker and always giving me a heart attack! He's your typical BOY!!  but I love him with all of my heart! So that was today, nothing too crazy out of the ordinary just my little ones birthday!

http://video214.com/play/hLIufZxt0qEaj1We8pUgJg/s/dark

http://video214.com/play/hLIufZxt0qEaj1We8pUgJg/s/dark

Here is the video from when Niko was born. I'm so glad we got this, I wish we would have had something like this for Meeka! But here's my little one.

wow it's been 1 year since I"ve been here, no sense in really going back and even trying to sum up an entire year!...
  So now I will start with today. we are getting ready for Niko's 2nd Birthday which is going to be next Sat. Pretty excited about it! The kids have grown so much. Meeka got into Eagle Ridge Academy which is an excellent school and I"m very excited about that! I've been praying that she will get into a good school for next year. the school districts in Richfield are not good at all. She will have uniforms for next year so it should be interesting!   They both continue to amaze me. Niko has his 2yr dr appt on Tue, I'm a little concerned with his speech, just like Meeka, not talking a whole lot, but man is he a creature!! We now have an apple computer so I will have to figure out how to do pics from this computer now, man oh man another thing to learn. I work for Abrakadoodle as a parent volunteer, it's a great thing, all the hours I work go towards art classes for Meeka and Niko, which I would pay for anyway because I truly believe that Art is something that a child really needs to be able to develop and learn and grow. I know that I've always loved art, it truly sets me free and makes me feel inspired! I just wish I had more time to do it.. I do little projects with them here and there, but nothing for myself!.  Well hopefully now I will be more consistent in this blog I'm so bad at it, I've got the time I just forget. :) So there we are.. Nixon and I are trying for #3 and it's always a roller-coaster of emotions for me, when we do this.. but in the end I need to understand that it's Heavenly Father's timing and not mine and rest assured that he knows what he is doing.... patience.... which is always hard for me. But besides that everything is the same ol same ol :)